When we see someone being placed into a position of
leadership, or called to a position of service that we see ourselves better
suited for, what does our heart feel; does it constrict within us, resenting (begrudging)
the individual, or does it rejoice?
Comparison is a form of measurement that can lead us down the
slippery slope of sin. It yields works of the flesh such as jealousy, envy,
bitterness, backbiting, gossip, derision, and unkind judgment of others. There
is great danger when we begin to compare ourselves against another, especially
within the church body. It can bring divisions among brethren that can be
irreparable. I confess that I have been guilty of comparison and have had
trouble with envy. All the enemy needs is a foothold if I give him the chance, and
he begins to whisper all sorts of wrong thoughts in my head.
Side Note: Sin
is not sin if you do not answer the door of temptation. If you are tempted to
envy, repent at the first thought and move on, it then does not birth sin because
you do not dwell on it, letting it take root (James 1:14-15).
I have struggled with comparison in part because of the way I
grew up. This is by no means an excuse, but it does show me a root cause as to
why I have struggled with it. Many people have root causes for their behavior but
once identified they can begin working on it, and with God’s help, overcome
their weakness for it. The root cause of my behavior was in part because of my
childhood.
My childhood was very violent. I grew up in a home with an alcoholic
father who would beat my mother mercilessly. After my mother left my father, she
had her own brokenness to deal with, so I grew up lacking praise and acknowledgment
as a child. It seemed that my efforts were often greeted with disregard and no
recognition whatsoever. Any achievement came without merit. As children, we
seek these things from our parents; we want to know we matter and have value. Consequently,
because I was starved this acknowledgement, as an adult, I found myself seeking
to fill this gaping hole from others, especially those in positions of authority,
interesting enough. I found myself doing and serving for the reward of recognition
and praise. It fed a deep reservoir that needed filling. I believe comparison
comes from a deep need to be recognized. But through the work of the Holy
Spirit I came to realize that it was a heart sickness I did not want in my life,
and God used my time in the word to show me this.
During one of my studies, the Lord led me to read 1
Corinthians 3 to 4:1. This part of scripture talks about being babes in Christ
and still struggling with envy, strife, and divisions among believers. It broke
my heart to tears when I realized that I had been serving carnally. That I was
seeking fleshly desires and accolades for my own gain and not for His glory. God
disciplines those He loves, and He did that day with me, but He did it in great
love and tenderness because that is how He teaches us. He truly is the greatest
parent. He desires for us to come up higher with Him, but He can’t if all we do
is look around at others and what they are doing compared to us; …But they [who are], measuring themselves
by themselves, and comparing themselves among themselves, are not wise (2
Corinthians 10:12). How powerful and quickly our emotions of jealousy and envy can
rise up within us when we are still walking in our carnal nature. This was the situation
Paul faced with the church in Corinth. A church with problems, struggles, and
pressures that needed addressing if they were to grow spiritually.
A Study of 1
Corinthians 3:1-4
Dear brothers
and sisters, when I was with you I couldn’t talk to you as I would to spiritual
people. I had to talk as though you belonged to this world or as though you
were infants in Christ. I had to feed you with milk, not with
solid food, because you weren’t ready for anything stronger. And you still
aren’t ready, for you are still controlled by your sinful nature. You are
jealous of one another and quarrel with each other. Doesn’t that prove you are
controlled by your sinful nature? Aren’t you living like people of the world? When
one of you says, “I am a follower of Paul,” and another says, “I follow
Apollos,” aren’t you acting just like people of the world? (I Corinthians
3:1-4 NLT)
Paul starts out 1 Corinthians 3 expressing to the church of
Corinth that he can’t even speak to them as to spiritual people but as to carnal, as to babes in Christ. Paul desired greatly to feed them solid food,
getting to the meat of the word, but they were still acting fleshly. For He saw
envy, strife, and divisions among them, calling them out as behaving like mere
men; men who still walked as the world did. They were gloating and laying claim
as to whose ministry camp they came from….comparing themselves with one another.
When we are not fully walking in the Spirit, we do not exhibit the fruit of the
spirit.
…Walk
in the Spirit, and you shall not fulfill the lusts of the flesh. For the flesh
lusts against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh; and these are
contrary to one another, so that you do not do the things you wish. (Galatians
5:17 NKJV)
It is necessary that we can be instructed as believers when
God is bringing disciplinary instruction our way. Paul was doing just this when
speaking to the men in Corinth because they were still behaving like the world
by comparing themselves to each other. If we are to manifest fruit in our walk
with God, the fruit should be evident; the evidence of love, joy, peace,
longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control towards one another. We who belong to Christ
have to crucify the flesh and its passions and desires; desires to elevate
ourselves against another; to gloat and proclaim superiority over another.
If we live in the Spirit, let us
also walk in the Spirit. Let us not become conceited, provoking one another,
envying one another (Galatians 5:25-26 NKJV).
God cannot, and will not, use us if we are still walking in
our carnal state. It becomes about us when feelings of strife, envy, and
jealousy engulf our emotions. It is a “me first” mentality rather than a “God
first” mindset. We cannot walk around thinking what can we get for it—what will
I be credited for? If we find ourselves serving without the heart of loving
others beyond ourselves, we do for our own conceit. I want to learn to rejoice
with my sister or brother when God elevates them, not begrudge them. Are we not
just mere servants?
Let a man
consider us, as servants of Christ and stewards of the mysteries of God. (I
Corinthians 4:1 NKJV)
Let the Lord be our judge for it is He and He alone who
gives the increase. One may water, and one may plant, but it is God who gets
the glory, and each one will receive his just reward according to their
individual labor, so why compare? So, if you are struggling with comparison, I’d
say what Barney Fife of The Andy Griffith show would say, “Nip it, Nip it in
the bud!” and move on.
